A Life Renewed & Reborn through Zen, Yoga and Really Good Music!: 10/10/10

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Aerosmith - You See Me Crying

This is such a beautiful song I wish they did not put that stupid intro on there -
at least its only a few seconds long.

This song makes me want to cry and right now I am relating way to much to this. It has been a good day that ended crappy. There is only so much one person can handle and right now I need a kick in the ass to remember how to live instead of run. I am not used to being alone and I still after 18 months I can't stand my days off cause I don't want to be home alone, I hate it. But at the same time I don't think I want someone here either I just need to find other people other "circles" to do things with, I move back up here to New England thinking I will have no problem finding other people to work with or classes or study or just hang out and no luck, oh damn I am being whiny on here I didn't want to do that, but damn I can't scream in silence for much longer.

Please don't get me wrong I am happy and I am very happy here, I just need some interaction with like minded people. I want to dance under the moon again, I want to say Merry Meet or Blessed Be and not get looks like I just jumped off the crazy train. I don't have my sense of community here I guess thats it. I used to teach magical craft classes and all that - I need a potluck supper with a circle!

On a brighter less whiny note I finally broke down and bought a winter coat today in Littleton, I like Littleton thought I might find some witchiness there, did find a store but thats it - I think that is very strange a store on its own - not unless there are people there to buy the stuff and there are always people there, so where are you all hiding??? Oh damn I am whining again.

Lets see x-husband I think has finally got it - talk to me like a human or leave me the fuck alone, one can only be texted or e-mailed "send me a picture of your big titties" so many times before you reach your want to puke limit. There is a reason you are my X-husband. So that shit is over so that is good. Got a coat that is good, talked to an old friend today another good, dropped my huge bowl of homemade pasta salad all over the floor that was not so good, LOL. Oh and ate Cracker Jacks and drank Coffee only thing missing is the Lucky Charms. (ok some of you might not get that - but I do and it makes me smile a big huge smile), so maybe it was not all that bad a day.

I did drive all the way to The Green House to go to Open Mike night and there were no seats and I was not standing in a bar all night by myself - sitting would have been fine but not standing. That did kinda suck cause I had to turn around and drive all the way back, but what the hell my car is great on gas. I have had it for 3 months and only had to put gas in it 3 times so far and I drive all over these mountains and drive down to Nashua too (thats a couple hours - but they have a Trader Joes' and my brother)

Oh hell I just need someone to go get a cup of coffee with!
Dunkins' anyone? Damn to late they are closed already!